It’s Depression Awareness Week~

I’ve been feeling kinda crappy the last few days.. A few problems came up and there’s so much to do.. I’m still annoyed by how limited I am with using wordpress.com for a portfolio website.. I think I might need to spend some money on my portfolio site.. sigh.. There’s still the reminder letter asking me to renew Frozenfa license.. I still wonder if I should keep renewing.. Frozenfa is like my baby, I can’t bear to give up on her..

So I was kinda surprised to find out just an hour ago that it’s Depression Awareness Week~ Read some articles from TheMighty.com and Blurt.. it got me thinking about how just last “night” I was staying up to listen to a friend’s problem.. when I end up being the one who got emotional, but hey, by the time i was listening to my friend it’s already 6.30am, I’m exhausted from working on my portfolio.. but somehow I end up writing about things I’ve always felt, but never mentioned out loud.. It was emotionally exhausting, and 1hr later i went to bed more emotionally exhausted than physically exhausted.. and even after a 7hr of on/off sleep, I still end up feeling exhausted most of today.

Now this really suck. There’s so many shit to do and the last thing I want is to be slowed down.. I’ve been encouraging some of my friends who’ve been feeling down.. and then now when I’m down.. I don’t even know who to help cheer me up~😄 Shit thing about surviving multiple breakdowns and receiving almost no help to get back up is that each time shit happens, you don’t know who to get help from. Sure, there have been several friends who’ve kindly offered to listen to me.. But I guess I’m done and tired of trying to tell people my problems, and even more tired of hoping to get some “understanding”~

I created Frozenfa to help me express.. and hopefully help others who can relate to my drawings express themselves too.. but it’s kind of sad how I seem to have lost inspiration to draw more as I see more and more of my friends artworks being stolen and sold as cheap made in china or made in Thailand products.. My friends.. those artists.. they’ve worked so hard to produce their art. to earn a living from it. And yet businesses in Bugis and Somerset and I don’t wanna know where else in Singapore, are selling those stolen designs on tote bags, leather purses and all like it’s nothing! People in the business scene can be so ugly, I lost all mood to make new drawings. I’ve even lost mood to open a pushcart again.

Sure, some may say “it’s not like your artwork is the one getting stolen”~ Easy for them to say so~ For years, ever since I started collaborating with Karin, every few months I’d have a nightmare seeing mine and Karin’s work being sold at cheap prices in shops. Imagine how traumatic is it for me to actually see my own nightmares 1 by 1 turning into reality? I saw Ellen’s works stolen, Toru Sanogawa’s works stolen, and now I saw sweet Karin’s artworks stolen!! The shittiest part is all these businesses CAN and WILL continue to sell stolen designs because not everyone can afford to hire lawyers internationally to start a lawsuit! It’s disgusting!! So much bullshit about IP rights and all, but in the end, unless you can afford a goddamn lawyer, you can’t get these thieves to stop selling your artworks. At most you can ask them to please take it down. They’d take it down for awhile.. and then they’d put it right back up~ I know because that’s what the pushcart at Bugis Junction did! How is a housewife supposed to afford hiring lawyers in multiple countries??? Who can afford that kind of money?! We’re not some superstars. We’re just artists trying to earn what little we can!

In a way I’m glad I never agreed to accept one customer’s offer for some partnership rights. She wanted to partner with me, saying that with her contacts, she can get products featuring TIM in bookshops like Popular etc~ But she kept insisting about how it’s cheaper to print and produce in Thailand, and even cheaper still if done in china. -_- And all the while she produced zero paperwork to show me what is her actual proposed plans. A few meetings was held but everything’s just verbal. And she expects me to agree? When she kept thinking of mass production in Thailand/china? My friends are not even printing anything in those countries and already their artwork is stolen and mass produced from there! Karin once bought me a tshirt from the local art market as a birthday gift, and that lady who wanted to partner with me even commented on how her friend bought the same design I was wearing at Thailand for less than 1/3 the price Karin paid for my prezzie! And we bought it from the original artist’s stall! There they are trying to earn a living in their home country, and in Thailand people are buying the same designs for less than 1/3 the original price and are damn smug about it!

So far I’ve only managed to photograph 1 of the pushcart at Bugis Junction as part of evidence. I’ll confirm with Karin for permission first before sharing the shop’s name with everyone. I sincerely hope then, that people will support by not buying their products. Original artists gets nothing from stolen artworks, damn it. How will you like it if you finished your job and someone else submits it to your boss and gets your salary instead?

Some said it’s silly of me to let go of such opportunities.. But Frozenfa is my life.. T.I.M. is basically me. I don’t want people stealing him. Which is probably why I’ve stopped uploading new designs online, though I have a whole bunch scanned etc.. He’s a monster. But he’s my monster. If I can feel so pissed and upset looking at all my beloved friends’ artworks stolen, I can’t imagine how I’d feel if Tim gets stolen as well~

I think I’ve been ranting far too much.. If you’re still reading this, thank you for hearing me out.. ^^” Sorry about the long ranting.. just need to get some frustration out somewhere.. and since it happens to be Depression Awareness Week, I think no better time to do some much needed venting hey? ^^” I better logoff and head to sleep.. Gotta company mum to polyclinic to get dental referral in… shoot.. 4hrs time.. argh! need to get new inhaler and prednisolone too since there’s been so much burning every day this Hungry Ghost Month and darn neighbor next door won’t quit smoking at our shared corridor.. >_<

“Don’t Let Them Break You”

Earlier, I came across this by The Idealist at Facebook and thought I’d share it here.. along with some of my thoughts:

I think it’s a sound advice hey? However, if you do break down, remember to pick yourself up. I survived over a dozen breakdowns, damn it! What is important is how stubborn you are about not wanting to give up~ If no one believes in you, believe in yourself. If no one help you, help yourself! Put in the effort. I understand that sometimes it’s tiring as hell (I survived over a dozen breakdowns. Trust me, I can understand the feeling at least a tiny bit). But try to keep at least one word in mind – “Try”. Keep Trying. Dying might seem to be the solution but who’s to say what’s there after death?

If you’re lucky you might just *poof* and cease to exist. BUT what if you’re unlucky? if somehow one of the religion is true – who is to say you might not be in deeper shit after death hey? Keep living. Find help is necessary. If you can’t find a family/friend to talk to, try counselors. I’m not sure about other country, but in Singapore, other than Samaritans of Singapore (SOS), you can also get help from REACH: http://www.reach.org.sg/index.php/our-services/reach-counselling/reach-counselling-counselling-services

Their counseling fees is based on your household income.. From my personal experiences: bear in mind that they’re just counselors. Ultimately you are the one who have to make it work. Let them help you, but don’t get overly dependent. Don’t expect to go for counseling and exit the room with problems all solved or feeling happy as fck. They’re counselors, and they are only human. They will most likely help by asking you questions to help guide you on how to tackle your issues. I must admit, I often left their office feeling like I just got run over by a truck. It was often emotionally/mentally exhausting. But I learned so much more about myself and others in my life and what I can do to help myself. Take care~❤

Restructuring this blog~

Hmmm… I don’t think anyone reads this blog anymore, but I think I should just make an update hey?🙂 I’m working on my portfolio at the moment and I’m planning to use this blog as a platform rather than spending on web hosting again~ As you can see, I’m already using a different theme and changed the blog’s structure a little.. Most likely I’ll have a static page load instead of my usual blog posts.. By the way, sorry about all the broken links in my previous posts.. seems like fb changed the url for loading photos~ =__=” I’ll work on loading photos directly via this blog instead later~ ^_^”

Mental Health on The MightyBefore I sign off, I’d like to share this facebook page that I’m a fan of: Mental Health on The Mighty. I hope, more people will check out their fb, or better still, their website~ Take some time to read the articles there, especially if you know someone who might be suffering from a mental disease. Sometimes, it’s very easy to think that that somebody’s just being moody.. it’s just a phase.. but once you’ve read more, you might come to understand that there might be a reason why the kid’s screaming out his lungs and throwing tantrum like a spoilt brat? Why the mother just staring? Why he’s hitting her? Why she’s cutting herself? Why she’s suddenly so so SO happy? What’s wrong with that nutcase?!

It’s not just a phase.. Mental disease is nothing like your typical flu~ It doesn’t go away just like that~ Try reading some of the articles.. Help us with our fight against mental disease~❤

2012 Poster Design Portfolio

I’m personally quite happy with my 2012 portfolio.. Given how sickly i was last year with asthma and hyperthyroidism, i’m glad to have come up with 2 hotsellers last year! (based on sales in Singapore) – WHAT Work/Life Balance & Sai Kang Warrior are designs inspired by my brother who gave me the ideas (Thank you, Bro!! =D). The sales of these 2 designs is currently on par with my previous hotseller – Act Blur, Live Longer design~ Yay!!😀

WHAT Work/Life Balance A4/A3 Glossy Laminated Poster          Sai Kang Warrior - To The Rescue!!! A4/A3 Glossy Laminated Poster

To my overseas fans, “Sai Kang Warrior” an unofficial title we give someone who has to do all the work that is not in their job scope~ “Sai” means Sh*t, and “Kang” means job/work/task~😉

Other than the 2 hotsellers above, i’m happy to have come up with the following other poster designs: =D

'Cause I'm Cute! A4 Glossy Laminated Poster Happiness Is... Understanding What You Want & What You Need~ A4 Poster Don't Test My Patience! A4 Poster

Can You PLEASE Use Your Brain~ A4/A3 Poster It's Ok To Cry~ A4/A3 Glossy Laminated Poster Cool Story Bro!!! A4/A3 Glossy Laminated Poster

Cool Story Bro~ A4 Poster Asset Rich, CASH POOR! A4/A3 Glossy Laminated Poster I Am... Fine! A4 Poster (Emily)

I Am... Fine! A4 Poster (Tim) Look How Many F***s I Give~ A4 Poster 

Excuse the language above~😉 just being myself~ eheh.. ^^”

Just realised there’re some A4 poster designs which i haven’t managed to upload to my fb page.. O_O” will work on it and update this blog later.. there’re also some designs which i have yet think of some quotes for them – like the following badge/keychain design:

 

Badges and Keychains now available at VivoCity & *Scape Underground! Happy Valentine’s Day!!

Badges @ VivoCity ToyOutpost

Available at ToyOutpost – Vivo City Shopping Mall
(near Golden Village Cinema)
1 Harbourfront Walk, Vivocity #02-27
Singapore 098585
Sun – Thur: 11am to 9.30pm
Fri & Sat: 11am to 10pm
Eve of Public Holiday: 11pm to 10pm

Mini Badges @ *Scape Underground

Available at The Gift Xchange at *Scape Underground: *SCAPE Underground, 2 Orchard Link
Singapore 237978
Mon – Thu: 12:00 pm – 9:00 pm
Fri – Sun: 11:00 am – 10:00 pm

Hey hey~ been busy these few days.. go some last minute projects like a rush proj of 100 custom badges (due last week) and a couple’s tee to be given for wedding gift (due these 2 weeks).. These, on top of having to design tshirts for my best friend’s wedding (by May latest)~ and i think i need to hurry up on the accounts for tax filing later (i think in march-april?)..

plus i’m supposed to get my badge machine repaired.. something i can’t do if it’s raining.. (can’t risk walking in the rain with the machine.. dun wanna damage it.. and i gotta get it fixed if i wanna top up my stocks of badges for the end of the month, and for over at VivoCity ToyOutpost and The Gift Xchange @ *Scape Underground..

Yep!! My keychains and badges are out on consignment at 2 shops at the moment!! =D Excuse the poorly taken pix.. am using an old htc wildfire which i adopted from my bro.. the camera is certainly nowhere near my late old sony ericsson phone camera.. ¬_¬ think i wanna get myself a sony xperia when i have the time.. can’t afford iphone.. to expensive for poor blokes like myself~

Our pushcart will reopen for business later end of this month – 23rd-24th March, at VivoCity, Level One – West Court. Our official timing is 11am-10pm as usual but just in case i’m slow in setting up (getting old), it’s always best to dropby noon onwards.. hehe.. ^^”

Frozenfa & Karin Taylor Pushcart Opening Dates

Oh, what rainy Valentine’s Day~ Try this!! Make a cuppa hot chocolate (one more if you are a pair of couples who happen to be free enough to read this blog..) and snuggle up and check out this cute Multi-Award Winning stop motion animation, Zero, by  Australian husband and wife filmmaking duo, Christopher and Christine Kezeloschest!! Seriously, LOVE IT!!! It’s sweet, heartwarming.. encouraging.. I say it’s perfect for both couples and singles!! =D i can’t imagine the amount of time and effort they have to put in.. Gotta respect them!! =D

Ok everyone!! Have a lovely Valentine’s Day everyone!! Stay warm~ ^_^